I knew him through a lady friend. I was online in messenger late 2008 when a sister friend popped up to say she had someone at her end she wanted me to meet. Allegedly he talked about so many things my friend could not cope up with him and she was thinking the two of us might just sort it well. Before I could ask any further questions a request to be added to my list came up ... in consideration to an existing friendship I dutifully clicked accept.
The very first chance of acquaintance was an outright challenge. Immediately a gush of arrogance blew from his end of the line . Apparently too evident to be true I took it as a joke and was laughing with every revelation spelled out before me. Guess it was just a matter of taking things in my own perspective. I do not talk the same way as he did and when I ever do usually it comes out insensible that I took things just as I would do it.
Too soon he literally flashed cold water right on my face when one day he came out with his naughty game. My friends were all privy to it - by then I never dream of meeting him - not with those obviously insincere " sure I will and am looking forward to seeing you " phrases most people usually and meaninglessly type on a stranger's window of a chat. As I look back to it now, I can go speechless. The point was I could have blocked him right there and then - but again - he appeared too unbelievable to take seriously that at such time when we meet online I end up giggling and even bursting into one big hearty laugh at every sarcasm he comes up with.
Physically, his photo was not one I would go gaga - vanity and conceit is surely a weakness if I may say. When it comes to friendship I tend to go deep . Intellectually, he does have something to say but again too much even for himself to listen and make sense. If he ever be famous in the social circle - his crowd is absolutely different from mine therefore I could not care more . Personally, I can say we were totally from two different worlds interacting in a totally different sphere yet the encounter stirred some kind of curiosity and interest in me maybe even a longing for something different that got me stuck.
Every chance of interaction was a calisthenics of character. When everyday I am polite and respectful because I must, he gives me the chance to be mean. Times when I am tired and quiet he would stir me up sending me to pick on words commensurate to his attacks. He is Mr. Asar.( I checked my Tagalog to find that it means to annoy ). If I was affected, surely I would never come this far ... reality check denotes that I actually enjoyed the exercise and was getting more of it. Untamed, I could have been more of an insensitive, rude and tactless person with a careless tongue and a dense heart.
Times when I need to work all day and comes home numb with fatigue, I longed for kulitan ... ( the act of being annoying). The chance makes me realize I am still alive. Times when words become too harsh and rude that I childishly cried " foul" ... somehow I can not seem to stay away from it and decided I should personally see the person behind the name and the words.
No one person in this world could totally be all good nor all bad. More everyone has our own time and reasons for becoming ourselves. Traces of both the positive and negative elements thrive in every person alive. He is not an exception.
Even through cyberspace a strong fence seemed to zealously protect something from trespassers. Insensible noises - superficial flirts and fleeting relationships - a man goes elusively sneaking out from any feel of trap. He is both obvious and vague. True, he is so many things to different people - being there as he wants people to think he is ... he plays an arduous task of fighting a right to be someone he is not but wanted to be regarded ... yet one fact a man like him will never verbally accept ... a man as he puts it ... one to be taken and read like a book ... page by page, chapter by chapter till you finish the whole lot and when you end up at the back cover you decide whether you might want to keep it.
My mortal enemy is my friend. We do not have to like each other to become friends that I decided for myself. Times when I wish we could just be one or the other but the echoes within me could not determine which one is it. I am obsessed with the interest to know more and see how far friendship could cope. So many things to say that is better left unsaid and will leave it as it is. In the meantime, I am really sleepy and must take a rest.
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